Men are that they might have joy.

You can have a good time. Of course you can! We want you to have fun. We want you to enjoy life. We do not want you to be prudes. We want you to be robust and cheerful, to sing and dance, to laugh and be happy. -Gordon B. Hinckley


Some happy places:

- Snuggling and watching sports.

- Eating ice cream and studying the gospel.

- Sitting on my daddy's bed chatting for hours.

- Laying on the floor in crazy positions writing in twelve different notebooks.

- Sitting quietly on the couch watching my family interact.

- Accompanying.

- Playing the piano in an empty house.

- Singing my heart out in the car.

:)

Sometimes I like to just sit and be close to God.

As I bundle myself in tight, yet elusive memories
the snow falls timorously toward the unwelcoming, cold ground.

As I turn my face to the light
the speckles of winter carress my longing face

A warm chill strikes through my overflowing heart.

Still the snow falls
and still God loves
and still winter speckles gracefully tingle through my visage,
melting right into my soul.

dust.

I am the person that cheerily gets swept along and falls between the cracks in the lives of others. I am the dust that settles in to make you comfortable, only to later be blown away by a practically accidental gust of irritation.

I'm grateful for those who have the patience and magnanimous amount of love it takes to let my flimsy particles rest upon them when I am left muddled in a mud of my own making.

Priesthood Dews

There are a lot of things to write about. There are so many ways to think. And so many ways to express ourselves. There are so many emotions to feel, and so many things to experience.

And out of all the so-manys there is this one decision. One little choice, that determines the outcome of the rest of my existence. Not just in this life, but the next. There's no going back, no changing my mind.

Bring it on.

Every step hurts.

Never have I been so abased. Never have I had to sit in a puddle of my own pride and foolishness, and watch the people around me love me in spite of myself. So much so as to take my hand and lead me away from my degraded state, toward hope.

It was at that moment that my Savior's incredible love sunk deep into my aching, cracking heart. And though I had been wicked, I was never worthless. Though I was helpless, I was never hopeless. Though I was humiliated, I was indeed humbled.

As the Savior wraps his loving arms around my throbbing, tender heart, I resolve to spend the remainder of my life in His service, as a pitiful attempt to make up for the damage I have caused.

http://lds.org/new-era/1982/08/running-on?lang=eng&query=every+step+hurts



.

Emotionally Opposite

Perhaps it's not so much that I feel too much, but simply that the timing of my emotions is completely off. I have a tendency to laugh at the all the wrong moments, cry only when it's embarrassing to do so, feel sad when I have no reason to be and elated when I should be miserable.
Am I ashamed of my antics? Not at all, though I have a tendency to feel attacked when people accuse me of intentional emotional dyslexia.

I am not emotionally upside down on purpose. Emotionally, I am not ANYthing on purpose. I have observed people try to be different just for the sake of being different. Recently, I have discovered that I have no similar inclination. It doesn't bother me to be the same as the majority, as long as I am genuinely myself. Feeling that way makes me different.

But not on purpose.


All I'm trying to say here is that we are all different. Yes, we are all special and unique, Brogan. But the only way we can accomplish a sincere feeling of peculiarity is to

just be.


We're all trying so hard to become something. The only thing I want to become is a more Christlike version of myself.

Thanks for listening.

Dear...

Lately I've been thinking about well, you. I've been thinking about what I can do for you. I want to bring a little joy into your life. I want you to walk away from me feeling better about yourself. Maybe we'll just have a quick, small-talky chat and it will be enough to make your face a little brighter and your heart a little lighter. Maybe it'll take a hug or a quick squeeze of your arm, just to let you know that someone cares about you. Maybe I can give you a ride or answer a question or shovel your walkway or do those dishes you never find time to get around to. I have a feeling you don't understand that I would do anything for you. We're talking give you my extra kidney to save your life type of anything. I'm not very good at showing it. Sometimes I forget to say it. The only way I can think of to explain it is that my momma once told me that I should always leave a place cleaner and better than it was when I got there. The same is true of you. I want you to be better off than you were when you met me. That's why I've been thinking about you. And why I always think of you.